《美食祈禱和戀愛》Chapter 44 (93):我的綽號
Among the many jobs that Richard from Texas has held in his life—and I know I'm leaving a lot of them out—are oil-field worker; eighteen-wheeler truck driver; the first authorized dealer of Birkenstocks in the Dakotas; sack-shaker in a midwestern landfill (I'm sorry, but I really don't have time to explain what a "sack-shaker" is); highway construction worker; used-car salesman; soldier in Vietnam; "commodities broker" (that commodity generally being Mexican narcotics); junkie and alcoholic (if you can call this a profession); then reformed junkie and alcoholic (a much more respectable profession); hippie farmer on a commune; radio voice-over announcer; and, finally, successful dealer in high-end medical equipment (until his marriage fell apart and he gave the whole business to his ex and got left "scratchin' my broke white ass again"). Now he renovates old houses in Austin.
德州理查一生幹過許多職業——我知道自己還漏掉許多——包括：煉油廠工人；十八輪卡車司機；達科塔州第一個勃肯鞋（Birkenstocks）總代理；中西部某垃圾填埋場的甩袋人（sack-shaker；抱歉，我沒時間說明什麼是“甩袋人”）；高速公路建築工人；二手車銷售員；越戰士兵；“商品掮客”（商品大致是墨西哥毒品）；吸毒者兼酗酒者（若可稱爲職業）；而後成爲洗心革面的吸毒者兼酗酒者（這職業體面得多）；某社區的嬉皮農夫；廣播旁白員；最後，高級醫療用品的成功銷售商（直到婚姻失敗後，他把事業給了他的前妻。）現在他在奧斯汀（Austin）爲人翻修舊房子。"Never did have much of a career path," he says. "Never could do anything but the hustle."
“不曾有過什麼生涯路線，”他說，“除了勞碌奔波外，一無所能。”Richard from Texas is not a guy who worries about a lot of stuff. I wouldn't call him a neurotic person, no sir. But I am a bit neurotic, and that's why I've come to adore him. Richard's presence at this Ashram becomes my great and amusing sense of security. His giant ambling confidence hushes down all my inherent nervousness and reminds me that everything really is going to be OK. (And if not OK, then at least comic.) Remember the cartoon rooster Foghorn Leghorn? Well, Richard is kind of like that, and I become his chatty little sidekick, the Chickenhawk. In Richard's own words: "Me and Groceries, we steady be laughin' the whole damn time."
德州理查不是擔太多心的傢伙。他可不是神經質的人，一點也不。不過我是有點神經質的人，因此崇拜起他來。理查來到道場，爲我帶來大而有趣的安全感。他從容不迫的自信，安撫了我與生俱來的緊張兮兮，提醒我一切都會沒事。（或至少會是喜劇。）可記得卡通裏的萊亨雞（Foghorn Leghorn）？理查有點像它，而我成了它身邊碎嘴子的助手小鷹。引用理查說的一段話：“我和食品雜貨，一天到晚都在笑。”
Groceries.
食品雜貨。That's the nickname Richard has given me. He bestowed it upon me the first night we met, when he noticed how much I could eat. I tried to defend myself ("I was purposefully eating with discipline and intention!") but the name stuck.
這是理查給我取的綽號。他在我們第一次見面的晚上，獻給我這個綽號，因爲他留意到我吃得不少。我想爲自己辯護（“我是有紀律、有目的而蓄意地吃！”），但這名字從此固定下來。Maybe Richard from Texas doesn't seem like a typical Yogi. Though my time in India has cautioned me against deciding what a typical Yogi is. (Don't get me started on the dairy farmer from rural Ireland I met here the other day, or the former nun from South Africa.) Richard came to this Yoga through an ex-girlfriend, who drove him up from Texas to the Ashram in New York to hear the Guru speak. Richard says, "I thought the Ashram was the weirdest thing I ever saw, and I was wondering where the room was where you have to give 'em all your money and turn over the deed to your house and car, but that never did happen . . ."
或許德州理查不太像典型的瑜伽人士。儘管我在印度的日子奉勸我莫去斷言什麼是典型的瑜伽人士（別讓我開始扯到前幾天在這兒遇上的愛爾蘭酪農，或南非來的前修女。）理查透過前任女友參與瑜伽，她載他從德州前往位於紐約的道場，聽導師演講。理查說：“當時我認爲道場是我見過的最詭異的東西。我心想，那個會讓你繳出所有的錢、車契和房契的房間在哪裏？不過卻從未遇上這種情況……”After that experience, which was about ten years ago, Richard found himself praying all the time. His prayer was always the same. He kept begging God, "Please, please, please open my heart." That was all he wanted—an open heart. And he would always finish the prayer for an open heart by asking God, "And please send me a sign when the event has occurred." Now he says, recollecting that time, "Be careful what you pray for, Groceries, cuz you just might get it." After a few months of praying constantly for an open heart, what do you think Richard got? That's right—emergency open-heart surgery. His chest was literally cracked open, his ribs cleaved away from each other to allow some daylight to finally reach into his heart, as though God were saying, "How's that for a sign?" So now Richard is always cautious with his prayers, he tells me. "Whenever I pray for anything these days, I always wrap it up by saying, 'Oh, and God? Please be gentle with me, OK?' "
那回的體驗——大約十年前——之後，理查發現自己隨時在祈禱。他的禱詞始終相同。他不斷請求神：“拜託、拜託，請打開我的心。”他要一個開闊的心懷。他總是請神“在事情發生那一刻給我信號”，作爲祈求開闊心懷的結束語。他回憶起那段時期，說：“食品雜貨，當心你祈求的東西，因爲很有可能如願以償。”經常祈求開闊心懷，如此持續幾個月後，你猜猜理查求得了什麼？沒錯——緊急開心手術。他確實被剖膛開肚，肋骨被分開，讓足夠的光線終於能進入他的心，彷彿神在說：“這信號不錯吧？”因此現在理查總是十分謹慎祈禱，他告訴我：“近來我無論祈求什麼事 ，最後總是說‘喔，神哪，請溫柔待我，好嗎？’”
