關於簡單的英語短笑話
笑話指能引人發笑的談話或故事,篇幅短小,故事情節簡單而巧妙,往往出人意料,取得令人捧腹的藝術效果。下面是本站小編帶來的簡單的英語短笑話，歡迎閱讀!
Bank Robbery 銀行搶劫
Two accountants are in a bank ,
當武裝捻匪突然衝進銀行的時候。
when armed robbers burst in.
正好有兩名會計人員在裏面。
While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers,
正當幾個搶匪向出納員取錢的時候，
others line the customers,
其他的搶匪就把顧客們，
including the accountants,
包括這兩名會計人員在內，
up against a wall,and proceed to take their wallets,watches,etc.
靠着牆壁排成一線開始奪取他們身上的皮夾子和手錶等物品。
While this is going on accountant number one jams something in accountant number two'shand.
當這件搶案正在發生的時候，一號會計人員把纂樣東西塞迸二號會計火員的手裏面。
Without looking down,a
沒有向下看，
ccountant two whispers,
二號會計人員就輕聲地說：
"What is this ?" to which accountant number one replies,
“這是什麼東西呀?”
"It 's that $50 I owe you."
一號會計人員回答說：“那是我欠你的五十元啦。”
簡單的英語短笑話篇二聰明的目擊人 A Smart Witness
A witness to an automobile accident was testifying.
有一名車禍目擊證人正在出庭作證。
The lawyer asked him,"Did you actually see the accident?"
律師問他：“你確實看見了這起車禍嗎?”
The witness:"Yes,sir."
目擊證人說：“是的， 長官."
The lawyer :"How far away were you when the accident happened?"
律師說：“當車禍發生的時候，你在多遠的地方?”
The witness:"Thirty-one feet,six and one quarter inches."
目擊證人說：“三十一英尺，六又四分之一 英尺。”
The lawyer(thinking he'd trap the witness):"Well ,sir,will you please tell the jury how you knewit was exactly that distance?"
這名律師說(心想他會讓這務目擊證人陷，入陰謀的勘計之中)：“那好吧，先生，請你告訴陪審團，你怎麼知道確實是那個距離暱?”
The witness:"Because when the accident happened I took out a tape and measured it.I knewsome annoying lawyer would ask me that silly question."
目擊證人說:“因爲當車禍發生的時候，就拿出了卷盡測量過宦。我早知道會莉一個令人傷腦筋.律師問。我那個蠢問題 。”
簡單的英語短笑話篇三救人 Saving Lives
At a pre-med university in St. Louis, we had to take a difficult class in physics. One day the professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A student rudely interrupted to ask Why do we have to learn this stuff?
To save lives. The professor responded quickly and continued the lecture. A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. So how does physics save lives? he persisted. It usually keeps the idiots like you out of medical school, replied the professor.
在聖路易斯的一所醫學院預科大學，學生必須修一門很難的物理課。一天，教授正在探討一個特別複雜的概念，一個學生粗魯地打斷他的話，問道：爲什麼我們一定要學這種東西?
爲了救人。教授很快回答，繼續講課。幾分鐘後，那個學生再次大聲堅持：那麼物理怎麼救人呢?教授回答：它通常可以把你這種笨蛋趕出醫學院。
簡單的英語短笑話篇四聰明的馬 A smart horse
There was a farmer who fell and broke his hip while he was plowing(耕地) , and his horse immediately galloped(疾馳，飛奔) five miles to the nearest town and returned, carrying a doctor on his back.
"That’s a pretty smart horse," the farmer’s friend later observed.
"Well, he’s not really so smart," the farmer said. "The doctor he brought back was a veterinarian!"
一位農夫在犁田時，不慎跌倒摔傷了屁股，他的馬立即飛奔到五哩外最近的小鎮，載了一位醫生回來。一個朋友看到後便誇讚說：“你這匹馬真是聰明!”
農夫說：“也沒有你想的那麼聰明啦!它帶來的是一位獸醫!”
簡單的英語短笑話篇五請朋友吃飯 Friend for Dinner
Friend for Dinner
Honey, said the husband to his wife, I invited a friend home for supper.
What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I havent been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I dont feel like cooking a fancy meal!
I know all that.
Then why did you invite a friend for supper?
Because the poor fools thinking about getting married.
請朋友吃飯
“親愛的，”丈夫對妻子說：“我邀請了一位朋友回家吃晚飯。”
“什麼?你瘋了嗎?我們的房子亂糟糟的，我很久沒有買過東西回來了，所有的碗碟都是髒的，還有，我可不想做一餐累死人的晚飯。”
“這些我全都知道。”
“那你爲什麼還要邀請朋友回來吃晚飯?”
“因爲那個可憐的笨蛋正考慮要結婚呢。”
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