英語閱讀英文國外笑話

英語小笑話小學 大綱

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笑話是一種用來逗笑取樂的文體。笑話,不僅能讓同學們在日常生活和學習中不時地會心一笑,還能從中學習到不少的英語知識。本站小編整理了小學英語小笑話,歡迎閱讀!

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  小學英語小笑話篇一

Getting into His Work

專注於工作

The priest was so concerned with the welfare of his pretty young parishioner that he invitedher to his private quarters to discuss her confession.

一位神父非常關切教區內一位年輕美麗的教友幸福,因此便邀她到他私人住處討論她的懺悔。

"Now, let me get this straight," said the priest. "This young man you went out with did he puthis arm around your shoulder like this?"

“現在讓我把事情搞清楚,”神父說道,“這個年輕人跟你出去他是不是像這樣把他的手臂繞在你的肩膀?”

"Yes, Father, and worse. "

“是的,神父,還有更糟的事情呢。”

"And did he put his hand on your thigh like this?"

“他也像這樣把手放在你的大腿上嗎?"

"Yes, Father, and worse. "

“是的,神父,還有更壞的呢。”

By now the clergyman was thoroughly aroused. He hiked the girl's skirt and gave her avigorous humping. "And did he do this?" he inquired.

此時神父已被刺激得興奮莫名,他撩起女孩的裙子,元氣充沛地和她做起愛來,“他也這樣做嗎?"神父問道。

"Yes, Father, and worse, "

“是的,神父,還有更糟的呢!”

“ But what could be worse than what Ijust did?"

“有什麼還比我剛剛所做的更糟呢?"

"I'm afraid, Father, that he gave me the clap."

“恐怕,神父,他把淋病傳染給我了。”

  小學英語小笑話篇二

No Fooling!

不要瞎混!

"Please be gentle with me, darling," said the bride on her wedding night, "I'm a virgin. "

“請對我溫柔一些,親愛的!”新婚之夜新娘對新郎說道。“我是個處女。”

"You're a virgin?" exclaimed her husband with surprise.

“你是個處女?”她丈夫吃驚地叫道,

"But you've been married three times. "

“可是你已經結過三次婚了啊。”

"That's true. dear; but my first husband was an artist and he just wanted to look at my body;

“沒錯,親愛的,可是我的第一任丈夫是位藝術家,他只想看我的身體。

my second husband was in advertising, and he would only tell me how great it was going to be;

我的第二任丈夫從事廣告業,而他只是告訴我那件事會有多美好。

and my third husband was a lawyer, and would always say, ”I'll get back to you next week. "

我的第三任丈夫是位律師,他總是說:“下星期我就回來看你。”

  小學英語小笑話篇三

A Lesson in Philosophy

哲學課一則

Why worry?

何必憂慮呢?

Really, you have only two things:to worry about-either you are sick or you are well.

真的,你只有兩件事要擔心,你不是會生病就是身體健康。

If you are well, you have nothing to worry about.

如果你身體健康,那麼就沒什麼好擔心的。

and if you are sick, you have only two things to worry about-either you get well or you die.

如果生病的話,只要擔憂兩件事,你不是康復就是死亡。

If you get well, you have nothing to worry about.

如果你康復的話,什麼也不必擔心。

and if you die, you have only two things to worry about-either you go to heaven or you go to hell.

如果不幸死亡的話,你只要擔心兩件事,你不是上天堂就是下地獄。

If you go to heaven, you have nothing to worry about.

如果上天堂,什麼也不需要你擔憂。

and if you go to hell,you'll be so busy shaking hands with old friends, you won't have time to worry !

要是下地獄的話,你會忙着和老朋友握手寒暄,連擔憂事情的時間都沒有!


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