感悟生活:享受一个人的独处时光
Do not rely completely on any other human being, however dear. We meet all life’s greatest tests alone.” -Agnes Macphail
不要完全依赖另一个人,无论他/她有多么珍贵。生活中最大的考验,我们只能独自经历。——加拿大首位女性议员艾格尼丝·麦克菲尔I have found that the more time I spend alone, the more comfortable I become in my own skin because I can truly get to know myself. This provides me with more patience to accept myself as I am, wherever I am in my journey, on a daily basis.
我发现独处的时间越长,我越觉得舒服、放松和自信,因为这样我可以认识真正的自己。这让我每天都有更多的耐心来接受自己,接受自己在生活旅途中的位置。This lesson was something I learned after spending a summer alone in Italy with a family friend.
这堂人生课是我独自一人在意大利学到的,当时我在一位世交朋友家里度过了一个夏天。
I embarked on the journey, turning off my phone for the first time, well, probably ever. I would be jetting all over America then landing in a country with a family basically unknown to me.
我踏上旅途,第一次关上了手机,嗯,这么多年来第一次。我在美国上方飞来飞去,然后降落在一个国家,和一家基本上不认识的人生活在一起。It wasn’t until two years after I returned that I wished I had spent more time living in the moment while experiencing the greatest adventure of my life. I was not comfortable enough in my own skin to truly be present in the magical moments presenting themselves in a foreign country.
直到我回来两年后,我才希望当时要是我能有更多的时间活在当下,经历人生中最大的冒险就好了。当时我不够放松、自信,无法在一个陌生的国家,在那样神奇的时刻,把它们展现出来。My mind stayed distracted as I wondered what people were thinking of me, and what I would post online to my friends back home.
当我在想我在人们心中是什么样子,当我在想回家后我会在网上发布什么内容时我就会分神。At 19 years old, it seemed much more important to capture photos to upload to social media. The Internet was a crutch for me to not feel so alone in an unknown territory. As brave as I was to be completely alone in my adventure, I had a thousand people to “connect” with on my lonely nights!
19岁时对我来说,拍摄照片并把它们传到社交媒体上要更为重要。互联网对我来说是个拐杖,能让我在未知的领域中不会感觉到那么孤独。和我独自一人冒险时一样勇敢,在孤独的夜晚,我有一千人可以去“交流”。Two years later I realized that I could have filled my days with activities for growth.
两年后,我意识到,我可以用有助于自己成长的活动来填满日子。I now wish I had traveled to nearby cities, spent my days reading in a cafe, tried acupuncture—anything out of the ordinary.
现在我希望我能游遍附近的城市,把时间用在在咖啡馆里阅读、尝试针灸——任何与众不同的东西上。The truth was I didn’t have the hobbies I have now. The trip did help me grow, but I regret that I could not simply enjoy the moments, instead of wanting thousands of others to see I was enjoying them.
事实上,我现在的爱好以前都没有。旅行确实帮我成长,但我后悔当时我没能享受当下的时光,而是去让成千上万个人看着我在享受。I discovered that if I want to be happy, it would be my own doing. Happiness is an interior process and comes without validation from others.
我发现如果我想要开心,那是我自己的事情。幸福是内心的过程,不需要得到别人的认可。This is something that is a lesson to be relearned each day.
这是我每天都要再次重新学习的人生课。Spending small moments of time alone—sans phone, tablet, laptop, TV, and radio—allows one to really tune in. We need to ask ourselves things like: What is my body telling me today? How do I feel today?
用碎片时间进行独处——关掉手机、平板电脑、笔记本、电视和收音机——允许自己真正地进行调整。我们需要问问自己:我的身体今天告诉我什么?今天感觉如何?There are all kinds of things we can do to enjoy our alone time, some of them very simple. I enjoy my shower, my yoga practice, and the scenic drive home, all without communication to the exterior world. This helps me to really absorb my practice and just “be.” I find it helpful to journal, old fashion style, with a pen and paper after this little escape.
我们可以做很多事情来享受独处的时光,有些事情非常简单。我喜欢淋浴,喜欢瑜伽练习,喜欢在开车回家的路上看秀丽的风 景,这些都不需要和外部世界联系。这能帮我真正消化自己的所做所为,仅仅安静的待着。我发现在这种小小的消遣之后,用在纸上用笔写日记这样古老的方式很有帮助。