做個聽得懂男人話的聰明女人(圖)
It's no secret that men and women communicate differently--but is there really no way to translate Mars talk to Venus speak? Ready for a practice run? Here are five common communication problems in relationships.
人人都知道男人和女人的表達方式不同——但真的沒有辦法讓“金星”聽懂“火星”的話嗎？準備練習一下嗎？這裏有五種在伴侶關係中經常出現的交流問題。
男人說：Uh huh. Right. Yeah. 嗯哼。對。是的。
女人的理解：He couldn't be less interested in what I'm saying. 他對我說的事情一點都不感興趣。
男人本意：I want to hear your story, but it's been 10 minutes and still no punch line. 我想聽你的故事，但十分鐘過去了你還是沒說出個所以然來。
Men don't process information in the lengthy way that women do, so telling him a story in the drawn-out way you would to one of your girlfriends isn't going to work. In short, cut to the chase and you'll get more of a reaction.
女人處理的信息冗長，而男人不是這樣，所以像跟你的姐妹淘閒聊那樣沒完沒了地講給他聽是行不通的。總之，說話直截了當，你會得到更多回應。
男人說：It's not a big deal. 沒什麼大不了的。
女人的理解：How trivial. （他認爲）這是小事！
男人本意：Let's not dwell on it. 我們不要老想它了。
Men come from the school of suck-it-up, while women tend to need more reassurance if something is bothering them.
男人們習慣於默默承受，而女人如果碰到什麼事煩擾她們，往往需要更多安慰。
男人說：I need some space. 我需要一些空間。
女人的理解：He doesn't want to be with me. 他不想和我在一起了。
男人本意：I care about you, but I also want some more independence. 我關心你，但我也想要更多的獨立空間。
In many romantic relationships, men use this blanket phrase instead of being more specific, as in: "I love the connection we have, but I miss spending time with my friends as well." Use your judgment: If he's still being affectionate and just feels a bit smothered, give him some breathing room. However, if you're only hanging out once a week to begin with, it might just be that he wants to end things--in which case, walk away.
在很多戀愛關係中，男人們都會說這種模棱兩可的話，而不是說得更詳盡，比如， “我喜歡我們之間的關係，但我也想念跟朋友們相處的時間。”運用你的判斷力：如果他仍愛你，只是覺得有點透不過氣，那就給他一些喘息的空間吧。但是，如果前提是你每週只和他出去玩一次，那麼這可能是他想結束關係的訊號——如果是這種情況，還是離開他爲好。
男人說：I'm sorry you feel that way. 你那麼想我感到很抱歉。
女人的理解：I'm being a psycho. （他認爲）我神經兮兮的。
男人本意：I just really want this argument to be over. 我真的不想再吵了。
Women like to hash things out, talking issues through from start to finish. Guys, on the other hand, have much more of a flight instinct when it comes to confrontation--especially if he doesn't fully understand why you're so upset.
女人們喜歡刨根問底，將問題從頭到尾說清楚。而另一方面，當發生衝突時，男人們本能地更想要逃避——尤其是當他不能充分地理解你爲什麼如此不悅的時候。
男人說：If you feel undervalued, ask for a raise. 如果你覺得報酬低，可以要求加薪。
女人的理解：Ugh, he think my problems are so simple--just fix it. 啊，他認爲我的問題很簡單，很好解決。
男人本意：Work's bothering you? Let me help! 工作讓你感到困擾嗎？讓我來幫助你！
The truth is, men tend to see themselves as problem solvers in romantic relationships, and so what comes across as condescending can actually be your guy's way of trying to help."
事實上，在戀愛關係中，男人往往視他們自己爲問題解決者，所以他表現得傲慢，實際上是他在試圖幫助你。
