時尚雙語:友誼也有"七年之癢"
【英文原文】
摘要：社會學家Gerald Mollenhorst研究了我們遇到朋友的環境是如何影響我們的社交網絡。他其中的結論之一是：每隔7年你要失掉大約一半關係緊密的社交好友。
Had a good chat with someone recently? Has a good friend just helped you to do up your home? Then you will be lucky if that person still does that in seven years time. Sociologist Gerald Mollenhorst investigated how the context in which we meet people influences our social network. One of his conclusions: you lose about half of your close network members every seven years.
Half Of Your Friends Lost In Seven Years, Social Network Study Finds
You are stuck with your family but you can choose your friends. Really? For years sociologists have argued to what extent personal networks are the result of your own preferences or the context in which you can meet someone. Would your best friend have been your best friend if you had not been in the same class for three years? And if you had not got to know your wife via mutual friends but in a dodgy bar then would she still have become and remained your wife?
In order to answer such questions, Mollenhorst conducted a survey under 1007 people aged between 18 and 65 years. Seven years later the respondents were contacted once again and 604 people were reinterviewed. They answered questions such as: Who do you talk with, regarding important personal issues? Who helps you with DIY in your home? Who do you pop by to see? Where did you get to know that person? And where do you meet that person now?
Limited in your choices
Mollenhorst investigated, for example, whether the social context in which contacts are made influences the degree of similarity between partners, friends and acquaintances. It was expected that the influence of social contexts on similarity in relationships would be stronger for weak relationships than for strong ones. After all, you are less fussy about your choice of acquaintances than your choice of partner. In relationships with partners, Mollenhorst indeed found more similarity than in relationships with friends. Yet interestingly, the influence of the social context on similarity did not differ between partners, friends and acquaintances. This reveals how strongly opportunities to meet influence the social composition of personal networks.
With his research Mollenhorst has confirmed that personal networks are not formed solely on the basis of personal choices. These choices are limited by opportunities to meet. Another strong indication for this came from the fact that people often choose friends from a context in which they have previously chosen a friend. Moreover, the extent to which our friends know each other strongly depends on the context in which people meet each other.
Individualism
Many sociologists assume that our society is becoming increasingly individualistic. For example, it is held that we strictly separate work, clubs and friends. Mollenhorst established, however, that public contexts such as work or the neighbourhood and private contexts frequently overlap each other.
Furthermore, Mollenhorst's research reveals that networks are not shrinking, whereas American research reveals such a decline. Over a period of seven years the average size of personal networks was found to be strikingly stable. However, during the course of seven years we replace many members of our network with other people. Only thirty percent of the discussion partners and practical helpers still held the same position seven years later. Only 48 percent were still part of the network. Therefore value the friends you have. As long as you have them that is.
【中文譯文】
近和某人進行了一次不錯的聊天？剛剛讓一個好友幫助裝飾你的房子？如果這個人在7年的時間裏仍然還這樣做的話，那麼你是很幸運的。社會學家Gerald Mollenhorst研究了我們遇到朋友的環境是如何影響我們的社交網絡。他其中的結論之一是：每隔7年你要失掉大約一半關係緊密的社交好友。
社交網絡研究發現，在7年的時間裏你失去了一半的朋友
你和家庭保持緊密的聯繫，但是你能根據自己所愛來選擇朋友。真是這樣的嗎？個人社交網絡在多大程度上是你自己選擇的結果還是你遇到他人時候所處的環境影響的結果，多年以來社會學家對此一直爭論不止。如果你和你最好的朋友沒有同班三年的話，他（她）還可能是你最好的朋友嗎？如果你不是通過你的好友認識你的妻子，而是在一個糟糕的酒吧裏認識的，那麼她仍然能和你結婚嗎？她仍然和你廝守着嗎？
爲了回答這些問題，Mollenhorst對1007人進行了一個調查研究，這些人的年齡在18至65歲之間。7年以後，Mollenhorst又和這些受調查者聯繫上，並且對其中的604人再次進行了調查。他們回答了諸如一下的一些問題：就一些重要的私事來說，你和誰交流？對家裏需要自己動手做的事情中，誰會幫助你？你會不期而至地拜訪誰？你以前在哪裏認識的這個人？你目前在哪裏遇到這個人？
你的選擇有限
比如Mollenhorst研究了交往發生的社交場所是否會影響伴侶之間、朋友之間以及熟人之間的相似程度。人們曾預計，在伴侶關係中，相比於牢固的伴侶關係，社交環境對相似性的影響對脆弱的伴侶關係的影響更大。畢竟，和選擇伴侶相比而言，你在選擇認識一些泛泛之交的人的時候就沒有那麼挑剔了。相比於朋友之間的關係， Mollenhorst確實在伴侶關係中發現了更多的相似性。不過令人感興趣的，社交環境對相似性的影響在伴侶之間，朋友之間，以及熟人之間並沒有區別。這顯示了遇到朋友的機會對個人社交網絡的組成的影響是如何之強。
根據這項研究，Mollenhorst證實，個人社交網絡的形成並不僅僅基於個人的選擇。這些選擇受限於遇到他人的機會。另外一個支持該說法的強有力的事實是：人們在選擇朋友的時候，經常在以前選擇過的社交環境中進行選擇。而且，我們的朋友相互認識的程度強烈依賴於人們相互認識時所處的環境。
個人主義
許多社會學家假設，我們的社會變得越來越個性化。比如，人們認爲我們嚴格把工作、社交俱樂部以及朋友區分開。但是Mollenhorst的研究認爲，公共社交場所比如工作或者鄰居以及私人社交場所經常相互重疊。
另外，Mollenhorst的研究顯示，儘管美國的研究表明（美國人的）社交在減少，但（全球的）社交網絡並沒有縮小。研究發現，在7年的時間裏，個人社交網絡的平均大小令人驚奇地平穩。但是，在7年的時間裏面，我們社交圈子裏面的人有進有出。7年以後，僅僅只有30%的伴侶和真正的朋友仍然保持着同樣的關係，只有48%的人仍然在我們的社交圈子裏。因此只要你有朋友的話，珍惜你所擁有的吧。
