時尚雙語:7個貼士 爲婚姻注入活力

After years of marriage, mind numbing 9-5s, and the same boring food, fun, and sex, even the best marriage can become stale. By designing our lives from a place of endless possibilities we can literally blow the socks off our relationships and create a world of fun.

When boringness is so prevalent that you hit the snooze button 4 times before dragging yourself out of bed, you know you aren't living the life you love. You cultivate a new love for love and for the sweetheart in your life, and here's how...
7 Ways To Breathe Life Back Into Your Marriage

1. Public Display of Team Effort. When the two of you are in front of other people, make it a rule to not contradict each other. Even when you know your partner is dead wrong, you can still reserve the option to take them aside and discuss the subject with them or wait until later. In this way you are avoiding causing embarrassment to them or undermining them.

2. Cheerleading Unit. Whenever you talk to people about your spouse make sure you tell them every little thing that you adore and admire about your spouse. When that person talks to your spouse in the future they will be sure to mention all the amazing things you have said and about how much love you have for them.

3. Date Your Wife. Instead of falling back into the same week-to-week rut, go out on a fun, spontaneous, and easy-going date. No picking fights, no arguing, just taking pleasure in what you have and loving each other. Be young and sexy again!

4 te Bucket Lists. A bucket list is a goal setting tool used strictly for fun activities. That's basically what you do, create a future of fun, dining, entertainment, adventure and exploration together on paper. This future will determine who you are being in the present, as well as the anticipation and teamwork that will be produced as you work towards achieving this together.

5. Give It To Them. Find out what your partner likes, such as you bringing them dinner while they watch the game (for him), or pouring a glass of wine and just listening attentively (for her) [you get the point], and just being fully giving. It is within your giving that your own love grows for that person. You can't make them love you more, but you can both make yourselves love each other more.

6. Don't Make Them Wrong. This is probably the hardest one of all. It means a total acceptance of both who they are and the decisions they make. What makes this hard is when your spouse is doing something that is killing themselves, like smoking for example, and you have to completely allow them to decide on their own and let them be.

7. Share The Landmark Forum. When Marina and I did the landmark forum together, it brought our extraordinary relationship to new heights that I didn’t expect. At the point I couldn’t even imagine getting any closer to her, despite the fact that we were getting closer each day. As an example, if our relationship was at a 15 out of 10 already, it hit 30 over the course of a weekend. I would say that we got our money’s worth.

結婚數年後，人會對朝九晚五的生活，令人乏味的食物、消遣和作愛方式而變得麻木，就是再美滿的婚姻也會變得陳舊。但通過精心設計蘊藏無窮可能的生活環境，我們能夠切實的驅除婚姻關係中的陰霾，創立歡樂的園居。

當睏乏氾濫到你要與瞌睡掙扎四次才能強迫自己離開牀時，你就知道你並不中意所愛的生活。你需爲你所愛的生活、所愛的人孕育新的愛。如下是幾點建議：

爲婚姻注入活力的7點建議

1、公衆前要有團隊精神。你倆需約定，當有外人在場時要避免發生衝突。甚至當你知道對方是完全錯誤時，你要將之先擱置，直至剩下你二人時才重提。這樣，你才能避免爲對方製造尷尬或破壞其聲譽。

2、成爲鼓舞人心的整體。無論何時與外人談論配偶時，你務必要提及每件配偶做得令你讚許和欽佩的小事。這樣他人再次談論你的配偶時他們就會提起每個配偶的優點以及你對之的愛慕。

3、與妻子約會。沒必要落入每週必定約會的窠臼，自發隨性的約會開心得多。因爲少了爲如何抉擇的爭執，你們會去享受那一刻，去愛彼此。

4、建立活動清單。活動清單是爲獲得樂趣的活動而設定目標的工具。它實際上就是在紙上記錄下你們爲創造快樂而完成做的事，比如吃飯，觀看娛樂活動，旅行和探險。這些活動將決定你現在的狀態，並且，在共同體驗中，你們將會變得出人意料的和諧。

5、把它給他/她。瞭解對方的喜好並行事。譬如他正在觀看遊戲，你可以把飯送到他跟前；她喜歡傾訴，你就可以斟一杯酒然後把自己的耳朵交給她；或是贈送禮物給對方。就在給予中你對對方的愛會悄無聲息的增長。雖然你可能無法讓對方也更愛你，但至少能讓自己更愛對方同時也更愛自己。

6、“縱容”對方。這可能是最棘手的一條。這意味着你要完全接納對方及對方的決定。之所以棘手是因爲你的配偶有可能在做的是摧殘健康的事，比如吸菸，但你還是不得不完全尊重他的決定，聽之任之。

7、分享觀點和思想。思想的交流讓我和Marina的關係達到我無法預料的新高度。每次交流都讓我無法想象能否還能與她更近，事實證明了我們越來越親近。打個比方，和妻子的關係融洽讓我感覺10元購買力似乎有15元之多，而到了週末就能高達30元--我們倍賺了。