外國風趣幽默故事閱讀
在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放鬆自己。下面本站小編爲大家帶來外國風趣幽默故事，希望大家喜歡!
外國風趣幽默故事：世界上最偉大的擊劍手
At an exhibition of the world’s best swordsmen，the third一place fencer took the stage. A fly was released，and with an arc of his sword he cut the fly in half. The crowd cheered. Then the second一place man sliced a fly into quarters. A hush fell in anticipation of the world's greatest swordsman. His blade came down in a mighty arc- but the insect continued on its way! The crowd was aghast. The greatest swordsman had missed his target completely, yet he continued to smile.
在一場世界最佳擊劍手錶演中，排名第三的擊劍手上場了。一隻蒼蠅放了出來，劍劃了一個弧，他將蒼蠅劈成了兩半。觀衆歡呼起來。緊接着排名第二的人將一隻蒼蠅切成了四半。現場一陣沉默，人們期盼着世界上最偉大的劍手出場。他的劍鋒以一個巨大的弧線劃了下來—然而那隻昆蟲還在繼續飛行!觀衆被驚呆了。最偉大的劍手完全錯過了他的目標，然而他還在微笑着。
"Why are you so happy?" someone yelled." You missed!”
“你爲什麼這樣高興?”有人嚷道，“你沒擊中啊!”
"Ah ,”replied the swordsman," yon weren’t watching very carefully. The fly lives yet, yes but he will never be a father.”
“啊，”劍手答道，“你剛纔沒有很仔細地看。蒼蠅還活着，是的—但他永遠也做不成爸爸了。”
外國風趣幽默故事：你一個，我一個
One late autumn evening two boys, having collected sack full of chestnuts, decided to share them out in a graveyard. On their way in one of the boys dropped the sack and two of the cockers rolled out. "We' Il get those later,” he said, and in they went to divide up the remainder. As they were counting them out a small girl happened to be crossing the graveyard，and to her horror she heard from behind a bush a voice say, "one for you , one for me. One for you , one for me” In terror she rushed to the gate and bumped into a policeman, "what' s the matter, little girl?" he asked, for she was obviously in great distress.
一個深秋的晚上，兩個男孩撿了一袋栗子準備到墓地裏去平分。在進去的路上，一個男孩不小心把袋子掉在了地上，兩顆栗子滾了出去。“我們過會兒再來找。”他說。他們就進去分其餘的栗子。在他們分栗子時，碰巧有一個小姑娘從墓地穿過。她驚恐萬分地聽到樹叢後面有個聲音在說:“你一個，我一個，你一個，我一個!”她嚇得急忙跑到門口，正撞上一個警察。警察見她萬分恐懼，就問:“小姑娘，出了什麼事了?”
"Oh, Mr. Policeman!" She wailed, "there're ghosts in the graveyard, and they're sharing out the dead bodies! Listen!”
“噢，警察先生。”她哭着說，“墓地裏面有鬼，他們在分死屍呢!你聽!”
And as she held a trembling finger to her lips they heard a voice say, "one for you, one for me. And we mustn’t forget those two by the gate!”
她把顫抖的手指豎在嘴脣前，這時他們聽見一個聲音說:“你一個，我一個，咱們可別忘了門口那兩個!”
外國風趣幽默故事：把我嚇個半死
A woman was walking along the beach when she saw a bottle on the sand. She picked it up and removed its top. Whoosh! A big puff of smoke appeared.
一位婦女正在沿着海灘散步，突然她看見沙灘上有個瓶子。她撿起了瓶子，拔開了瓶塞。呼的一聲，冒起一股濃煙。
"You have released me from my prison,”the genie told her. "To show my thanks, I’11 grant you three wishes. But take care, for with each wish，your mate, will receive double of whatever you request.”
“你把我從囚禁中解救了出來，”妖怪對她說:“爲了表示對你的感謝，我將滿足你三個願望。但是要注意，你每實現一個願望，你的丈夫會得到雙倍你所要求的東西。”
"Why?" The woman asked. "He left me for another woman.”
“爲什麼?他爲了另一個女人拋棄了我。”這位婦女問。
"That is how it is written，”replied the genie.
“只能如此。”妖怪回答道。
The woman shrugged and then asked for a million dollars. There was a flash of light, and a million appeared at her feet. At the same instant, in a distant place，her husband was down to see twice that amount at his feet.
這位婦女很無奈地聳了聳肩，要了一百萬美元。一道亮光閃過，在她的腳下出現了一百萬美元。與此同時，在遙遠的地方，她的丈夫正在看着腳下雙倍數目的錢。
"And your second wish?"
“你的第二個願望呢?”
"Genie, I want the world's most expensive diamond necklace.” Another flash of light, and the woman was holding the precious treasure. And in that remote place, her husband was wondering what had made so many precious stones come to him from nowhere at all.
“妖怪，我想要世界上最貴重的鑽石項鍊。”有一道亮光閃過，這個婦女的手中便出現了這貴重的寶物。在那個遙遠的地方，她的丈夫正在奇怪從什麼地方冒出這麼多寶石來。
"Genie，is it really true that my husband has two million dollars and more jewels than I do, and that he gets double of whatever I wish for?
“妖怪，我丈夫真的擁有了兩百萬美元，還有比我更多財寶，而且不論我要什麼，他就能得到雙倍嗎?”
The genie said it was indeed true.
妖怪說確實如此。
Okay，genie，I’ m ready for my Last wish,” the woman said. "Scare me half to death.”
“好了，妖怪，我已經想好了我的最後一個願望了。”這位婦女說“把我嚇個半死吧。”
