5個方法 就算上司吼你也能從容面對

If you're struggling to absorb negative feedback from your manager, ask to take some time to process the information. Then be sure to follow up with her.
如果你在接受經理的差評時感到生不如死一樣，那麼花些時間記住她說的吧，注意跟緊！

Ever felt caught off guard when your boss gave you some critical feedback? If you're like a lot of people, negative feedback can be rough to hear, and you might get defensive or upset or shut down. But those reactions, while understandable, won't serve as you nearly as well as responding calmly and professionally – even in the face of the toughest feedback. Here's how to do it:
老闆曾經毫不留情地給你差評？也許你和大多數人一樣，覺得聽差評小心臟會受不了，然後變得防守心強，不開心或者自閉。但是你的這些反應雖然是可以理解的，卻不如給個冷靜而專業的差評回覆對你更有利——即使是面對最撕逼的回饋。看看你該咋做：

t and foremost, get clear in your head that feedback – especially critical feedback – is something that will help you.
至關緊要的是，要清楚反饋—特別是批評—是能幫你提升的東西

After all, think about what would happen if your employer never gave you feedback: You'd stagnate in your job instead of grow professionally, and you'd be less likely to get better and better at what you do. And without feedback, you could become totally unaware of serious issues that could impact your career progression or reputation and even get you fired in some cases. (That last one especially matters! Even if you ultimately disagree with the feedback, it's crucial to understand your manager's perspective so that you can make better decisions for yourself.)
別忘了想想如果頭兒就是不給你回饋會怎樣：你的工作不會蒸蒸日上，而是停滯不前，你越來越沒有把分內事做得更好的可能。而且，你可能完全意識不到哪些影響你影響你工作進程和個人名譽的嚴重問題，甚至在某些情況下會讓你被炒成魷魚。（最後一條那肯定是相當重要！不管你對回饋有多大的老不情願，理解經理的觀點併爲自己做更好的打算都是很重要的。）

In fact, the more you can train yourself to actively want feedback – to seek it out and to welcome it when it comes – the better you're likely to do in your career, and the more people will probably like working with you.
事實上，你越想主動要回饋—尋找它歡迎它麼麼噠—你就越有可能把工作做得越好，而且可能會有更多人想和你一同工作。

't react right away.
不要做所謂的“隨機應便”

Too often, people's first instinct when hearing critical feedback is to defend themselves – to explain why their manager's assessment is wrong or why there were extenuating circumstances or simply to disagree.
常常是這樣，人們有聽見批評保護自己的本能——解釋爲什麼上司的分析不對、有些時候可以通融通融或者你爹我就是不同意。

It's certainly possible that your manager is wrong or that special circumstances were in play – but it's not helpful to leap straight there. If you do, you'll make it harder for yourself to truly hear and process the feedback, and you're more likely to come across as defensive rather than open to input. Instead, focus at first on just listening. Then …
你的經歷確實可能說錯了，有些事情也確實情有可原——但也別直白說出來。如果你義不容辭了，其實會讓自己更難於真正傾聽別人以及根據回饋做出調整，你可能會變得越來越防備，而不是敞開心扉。其實閉上嘴先好好聽聽，然後再￥%&*》·#。。。

vely show that you're open to the feedback.
讓別人知道你可喜歡聽回饋了呢

Giving critical feedback is hard, and many managers are nervous when they do it. The more you show that you are open to the conversation, the easier it will go for both of you – and the more likely you are to draw out additional useful information.
給批評建議對於一些經理來說是不好辦的。你越表現的想聽，這件事對你們倆來說越好過—你也更有可能挖掘到其他有用的信息。

If you simply absorb the input in silence, your manager might not have any idea what you're thinking or whether you're angry or upset or you disagree. Instead, try saying something like: "I really appreciate you telling me this. I didn't realize this was a problem, and I'm grateful that you raised it."
如果吸收建議時你只想做一個安靜的美男子的話，你的經理可能就被整懵圈了，他想啥呢？他生氣啦？他不高興啦？他不同意我說的？說這種話：“艾瑪您給我講的話實在對我改進工作大有幫助。我以前都沒有意識到這個問題，謝謝您幫我提出來！:)”

Note that you're not even agreeing with the feedback here – you're simply demonstrating that you don't have your guard up and that you welcome the conversation. And now you're having a discussion that's more about collaborative problem-solving than one-way criticism.
或者指出你一丁點都不同意上司說的——但是要表述的客觀開放而且希望就這一事談談。現在談話就變成了雙方共同解決問題，而不是單方面受批評了。

e relevant information
告訴上司相關信息

At this point, you might realize you have information or perspective that your manager doesn't, and which might impact her assessment if she knew it. It's reasonable to mention, for example, that the reason a report was late was because you were waiting on information from someone who was out sick, or that you didn't put as much energy into project X because the CEO told you to focus exclusively on project Y.
這方面指的是，你要知道你的一些情況或觀點你的經理不知道，而他們很可能因爲不瞭解而對你的工作有誤判。提起這些都是有用的，比如你提交報告晚了，是因爲你在等一個病號員工提供必要信息，或是你沒有花多大精力在X項目，是因爲CEO叫你集中精力於Y項目。

Most managers want to know that kind of thing, and it's fine to say: "You're right that I didn't put a lot of energy into project X. I had thought that project Y was a higher priority and so I was keeping my focus there. Was that the wrong call to make?"
很多經理想知道這些，那麼你但說無妨：“對於我沒有完全撲到X項目上去這一點你說得對。但我覺得Y項目更加重要，所以我花更多時間在它身上。我（老子，你可以自己這麼想但不要說）這麼做不對嗎？”

As long as you're actively demonstrating openness to your manager's message, it shouldn't come across as defensive to share information that might change her assessment.
一旦你對經理的信息打開天窗說了亮話，告訴他可能改變對你評價的信息就不會被當作是你的防備心理作怪了。

for time to process the feedback if you need to
如果需要的話，申請花些時間檢驗回饋是否合情合理

Sometimes it's tough to absorb critical feedback on the spot or to figure out how you want to respond. If that's the case, it's fine to say something like: "I really appreciate you telling me this. Would it be OK if I took some time to think about this and then circled back to you in a few days with my thoughts?"
有時立即接受批評建議或者想好怎麼回答是很難的。如果真是這樣的話，說這樣的話是可以的：“我很感謝你告訴我你的看法。能不能給我幾天讓我考慮一下你的建議，再來找你說說我的想法？”

Of course, then make sure that you really do circle back. At that point, the onus will be on you to raise the topic again. If you don't, you'll look like you're shirking a tough conversation or not taking it seriously.
當然嘍，別讓人巴巴地等着，一定要再找人家說啊。這時，提起這個話題的責任在你。如果你就不，那就會被人家認爲是你在逃避這個艱難的談話，或者是根本不把這個談話當回事。