《創業者》教你三大決定改變財富人生大綱

There’s nothing worse than a rich person who’s chronically angry or unhappy. There’s really no excuse for it, yet I see this phenomenon every day. It results from an extremely unbalanced life, one with too much expectation and not enough appreciation for what’s there.

本文爲與《創業者》雜誌的合作內容。原文發表於網站。

Without gratitude and appreciation for what you already have, you’ll never know true fulfillment. But how do you cultivate balance in life? What’s the point of achievement if your life has no balance?

如果你有錢，但是內心充滿憤怒和不快樂，這能叫過得好嗎？這種情況每天我都能見到。它源自於一種極度失衡的人生：期望過高，不懂得珍惜當下。

For nearly four decades, I’ve had the privilege of coaching people from every walk of life, including some of the most powerful men and women on the planet. I’ve worked with presidents of the United States as well as owners of small businesses.

如果對現在所擁有的不懂得感激和珍惜，你就永遠無法得到真正的滿足感。那樣你又怎麼能取得人生的平衡？成功又有什麼意義？

Across the board, I’ve found that virtually every moment people make three key decisions that dictate the quality of their lives.

近40年來，我有幸爲各行各業的人提供激勵指導，其中包括了一些世界上最具影響力的人物。我接待過的既有美國總統，也有小企業主。

If you make these decisions unconsciously, you’ll end up like majority of people who tend to be out of shape physically, exhausted emotionally and often financially stressed. But if you make these decisions consciously, you can literally change the course of your life today.

然而無一例外的是，我發現幾乎每時每刻人們都在做着三種關鍵的決定，而這些決定主宰着他們的人生質量。

Decision 1: Carefully choose what to focus on.

如果你作出以下決定時不假思索，你將落得和大多數人一樣的下場：身材走樣、情緒沮喪而且財政吃緊。相反，如果你是有意識地作出這些決定，你就能在當下改變自己的生活軌跡。

At every moment, millions of things compete for your attention. You can focus on things that are happening right here and now or on what you want to create in the future. Or you can focus on the past.

決定1：謹慎選擇關注的焦點。

Where focus goes, energy flows. What you focus on and your pattern for doing so shapes your entire life.

生活中隨時會有千百萬個事物爭奪你的注意力。你既可以着眼於當前發生的事情，又可以將焦點放在未來的計劃上，還可以關注過去。

Which area do you tend to focus on more: what you have or what’s missing from your life?

隨着焦點的變化，人的精力隨之而動。你所關注的焦點和行爲模式塑造了你的整個人生。

I’m sure you think about both sides of this coin. But if you examine your habitual thoughts, what do you tend to spend most of your time dwelling on?

對於生命中擁有的和失去的，你更關注於哪一個？

Rather than focusing on what you don’t have and begrudging those who are better off than you financially, perhaps you should acknowledge that you have much to be grateful for and some of it has nothing to do with money. You can be grateful for your health, family, friends, opportunities and mind.

你的答案肯定是兩者皆有。但是，審視一下自己的慣性思維，你的時間主要花在了哪一方面？

Developing a habit of appreciating what you have can create a new level of emotional well-being and wealth. But the real question is, do you take time to deeply feel grateful with your mind, body, heart and soul? That’s where the joy, happiness and fulfillment can be found.

或許，你不應該一門心思想着自己並未擁有的東西，嫉妒那些比自己富有的人。而是應該承認，自己擁有不少值得感激的事物，其中有些與金錢無關。你可以慶幸自己擁有健康、家庭、朋友、機遇和頭腦。

Consider a second pattern of focus that affects the quality of your life: Do you tend to focus more on what you can control or what you can’t?

養成珍惜自己已經擁有的一切，這一習慣可以將幸福感和精神充實帶到一個新的高度。但是真正的問題是：對於自己的頭腦、身體、情感和心靈，你是否真的努力去感恩？這些纔是快樂、幸福和成就感的源泉。

If you focus on what you can’t control, you’ll have more stress in life. You can influence many aspects of your life but you usually can’t control them.

還有第二種影響人生質量的關注模式：你更關注自己能夠控制的東西，還是那些不能控制的方面？

When you adopt this pattern of focus, your brain has to make another decision:

如果你着重的是自己無法控制的事物，生活中就要承受更多的壓力。你可以影響自己生活的諸多方面，但是通常無法控制它們。

Decision 2: Figure out, What does this all mean?

決定2：想清楚這一切的意義所在。

Ultimately, how you feel about your life has nothing to do with the events in it or with your financial condition or what has (or hasn’t) happened to you. The quality of your life is controlled by the meaning you give these things.

如何看待自己的人生，本質上與發生的事件、個人的財政狀況或者人生際遇都沒有關係。生活質量是由你所賦予事物的意義決定的。

Most of the time you may be unaware of the effect of your unconscious mind in assigning meaning to life’s events.

你下意識地賦予各種事情以意義，但是大多數時間裏卻並不清楚這一行爲有何影響。

When something happens that disrupts your life (a car accident, a health issue, a job loss), do you tend to think that this is the end or the beginning?

當某些事情打亂了你的生活（車禍、疾病、失業等），你會認爲這是人生的終點，還是另一個起點？

If someone confronts you, is that person insulting you, coaching you or truly caring for you?

如果有人與你爭吵，這個人是在羞辱你、教導你還是真正關心你？

Does a devastating problem mean that God is punishing you or challenging you? Or is it possible that this problem is a gift from God?

如果遭受嚴重的挫折，是上帝在懲罰你，還是在鍛鍊你？或者說，有沒有可能這是上帝送給你的禮物？

Your life takes on whatever meaning you give it. With each meaning comes a unique feeling or emotion and the quality of your life involves where you live emotionally.

你的生活會接納你所賦予的一切意義。每個意義帶來一份獨特的感受或情緒，而你的生活質量也和你的情緒息息相關。

I always ask during my seminars, “How many of you know someone who is on antidepressants and still depressed?” Typically 85 percent to 90 percent of those assembled raise their hands.

在研討會上，我總是喜歡問觀衆，“你們身邊是否有熟識的人在服用抗抑鬱藥卻依然鬱鬱寡歡？”一般來說，85%到90%的與會觀衆會舉手。

How is this possible? The drugs should make people feel better. It’s true that antidepressants do come with labels warning that suicidal thoughts are a possible side effect.

這怎麼可能？藥物應當改善人們的情緒。事實是，抗抑鬱藥的標籤上警告，副作用是可能有自殺念頭。

But no matter how much a person drugs himself, if he constantly focuses on what he can’t control in life and what’s missing, he won’t find it hard to despair. If he adds to that a meaning like “life is not worth living,” that’s an emotional cocktail that no antidepressant can consistently overcome.

但是，無論一個人吃多少藥，如果他總是沉迷於自己在生活中無法控制和缺失的那些部分，他很容易就會感到絕望。如果他滋生了“人生沒有意義”的想法，那麼無論什麼抗抑鬱藥物，都很難幫他持續擺脫這種情緒。

Yet if that same person can arrive at a new meaning, a reason to live or a belief that all this was meant to be, then he will be stronger than anything that ever happened to him.

還是這個人，如果他能夠找到一個新的意義、一個活下去的理由，或者接受一切是必然的觀念，那麼他將變得非常強大，無堅不摧。

When people shift their habitual focus and meanings, there’s no limit on what life can become. A change of focus and a shift in meaning can literally alter someone’s biochemistry in minutes.

當人們調整其慣性思維的焦點和賦予事物的意義時，生活將不再有桎梏。關注點的變化和意義的調整可以在短時間內改變一個人的生物化學。

So take control and always remember: Meaning equals emotion and emotion equals life. Choose consciously and wisely. Find an empowering meaning in any event, and wealth in its deepest sense will be yours today.

所以，控制自己，並始終牢記：意義等於情緒，情緒等於生活。有意識地作出明智的選擇。無論任何事件，都從中找到的積極意義，那麼，你馬上就能擁有最寶貴的財富。

Once you create a meaning in your mind, it creates an emotion, and that emotion leads to a state for making your third decision:

一旦你在心裏創建了一個意義，就相當於創建了一種情緒，而這個情緒可以將你引向第三個決定：

Decision 3: What will you do?

決定3：你要做什麼？

The actions you take are powerfully shaped by the emotional state you’re in. If you’re angry, you’re going to behave quite differently than if you’re feeling playful or outrageous.

你所處的情緒狀態主宰着你的行動。當你憤怒的時候，你的行爲會和你感到開心或震怒時大相徑庭。

If you want to shape your actions, the fastest way is to change what you focus on and shift the meaning to be something more empowering.

如果你希望養成某些行爲，最快的方法就是改變你的專注點，將找到更鼓舞人的意義。

Two people who are angry will behave differently. Some pull back. Others push through.

同樣處於憤怒狀態的兩個人會有不同的行爲。有些人會退縮，另外一些人會努力前進。

Some individuals express anger quietly. Others do so loudly or violently. Yet others suppress it only to look for a passive-aggressive opportunity to regain the upper hand or even exact revenge.

有些人以安靜的方式表達憤怒，有些人則選擇大聲說出來，或者用暴力的方式來表達。還有一些人會壓制憤怒，尋找以退爲進的機會，從而重新佔據上風，甚至進行報復。

Where do these patterns come from? People tend to model their behavior on those they respect, enjoy and love.

這些模式從何而來？人們通常按照自己尊敬、欣賞和喜愛的人塑造自己的行爲模式。

The people who frustrated or angered you? You often reject their approaches.

那些讓你沮喪或憤怒的人呢？你通常會排斥他們的方式。

Yet far too often you may find yourself falling back into patterns you witnessed over and over again in your youth and were displeased by.

然而很多時候，你可能發現自己陷入的模式是年輕時經常看到而且並不喜歡的。

It’s very useful for you to become aware of your patterns when you are frustrated, angry or sad or feel lonely. You can’t change your patterns if you’re not aware of them.

當你感到沮喪、憤怒、悲傷或孤單的時候，瞭解自己的模式是非常有用的。如果你不瞭解，就無法改變它。

Now that you’re aware of the power of these three decisions, start looking for role models who are experiencing what you want out of life. I promise you that those who have passionate relationships have a totally different focus and arrive at totally different meanings for the challenges in relationships than people who are constantly bickering or fighting.

現在你已經認識到這三個決定的力量，開始尋找你生活中最欣賞的榜樣吧。我保證，那些待人熱情的人，和那些總是與人爭吵或爭鬥的人相比，一定會有不同的關注點，並且給人際關係中的挑戰賦予完全不同的意義。

It’s not rocket science. If you become aware of the differences in how people approach these three decisions, you’ll have a pathway to help you create a permanent positive change in any area of life.

這並非難事。如果你認識到人們在做出這三個決定時的區別，你就會知道如何幫助自己在生活的任何領域創造出長期的積極轉變。（財富中文網）