戀愛必修課：10種方法讓你忘掉分手的那個他

Breakups suck (Bieber and Selena, we feel you.) But lots of times, they're for the best. (Repeat after us: It's for the best.) Susan Elliot, relationship counselor and author of Getting Past Your Breakup, and Caryn Beth Rosenthal and Maryjane Fahey, authors Dumped and founders of , have tips on moving on.
失戀的感覺糟透了（剛分手的小情侶比伯和瑟琳娜，我們懂你們的感受）。但是很多時候，分手其實也是一件好事。蘇珊-埃利奧特是戀愛關係顧問，也是《讓失戀成爲過去》的作者；貝絲-羅森塔爾和瑪麗安娜-費伊是《分手》的作者和網站的創建者，她們一起給出了快速走出失戀痛苦的幾個小貼士。

1. Go Cold Turkey
戒掉和他之間的聯繫

Staying in touch with him just keeps you stuck in the past, so at least in the beginning, break off all contact: Unfriend him, remove his name from Gchat, and delete him from your phone. If you have friends in common, take a temporary hiatus from them, too.
和他保持聯繫只會讓你沉浸在過去，所以至少一開始時和他解除所有的聯繫：和他解除好友關係，把他的名字從Gchat聯繫人列表上去掉，把他的信息從電話中刪除。如果你和他有共同的朋友，暫時也和他們斷開聯繫。

2. Travel Somewhere Fabulous
去美麗的地方旅遊

Take a trip to a place that's the total opposite of where you live. So if you're in the city, head to a yoga retreat or spend the weekend at a spa in the country; if you're in a small town, party in Austin or Miami with your bestie. Travel not in your budget right now? At least hang out in a different part of town. When you're taking in a ton of new stimulation, you won't have a chance to wallow in the past.
去一個和你現在所住地方完全相反的地方旅行。所以如果你現在住在城裏，那你可以去瑜伽靜養所或週末去鄉村做spa；如果你住在小城鎮裏，那你可以和死黨去奧斯汀或邁阿密聚會去。現在沒有預算去旅遊？至少去城鎮中的另一個地方玩玩。如果你周圍到處都是新鮮的事物，你就不會有機會沉迷於過去了。

3. Eat More Salad
多吃點兒沙拉

The iconic post-breakup image is a girl in her sweats with a remote in one hand and a pint of Ben & Jerry's in the other. But even though you might feel like scarfing a dish of Cherry Garcia and vegging all day, you'll move on faster by eating healthy and amping up your workouts (a natural endorphin booster, btw). It's cheesy but true: When you feel terrific about how you look on the outside, you'll feel better on the inside too.
分手後的女孩標誌性形象是一手拿着遙控器，一手拿着一品脫的本＆傑裏冰激凌。但即使你可能喜歡一天到晚吃櫻桃巧克力冰激凌和蔬菜，但健康飲食和加大運動量會讓你的動作更靈敏。這句話雖有點兒俗氣但卻是真的：當你對外表滿意的時候，你的內心也會感覺良好。

4. Flaunt Your Body
秀出你的身材

Ditch the breakup comfort clothes (college sweatshirt, boxer shorts) and rock outfits that amplify your hotness, like stilettos, a mini, or red lipstick. Every stare you get equals a confidence k yourself out in the mirror, and give yourself props for your sexiest features.
脫掉寬鬆舒適的衣服（大學的運動衫、平角短褲），穿上能讓你辣味十足的服裝，比如穿上細高跟鞋、迷你裙或塗上紅色的脣膏。每受到一次注目，你的自信心就會提高一次。照照鏡子，找出自己性感的地方，誇獎一下自己。

5. Schedule a Massage
預約去做按摩

Getting pampering puts your focus back on you instead of the relationship. Plus, getting a facial or pedicure makes you feel and look fantastic.
享受一下舒服的全身護理，會讓你把注意力重新放到自己身上而不是放在感情上。另外，做個面部護理或修修腳會讓你感覺好極了，看起去也很棒。6. Fake It 'Til You Make It
假裝忘掉他，直到你忘掉他

Trust us on this one. Even though you're not over him, act like you are…and it will eventually manifest. Force yourself to go to parties and flirt with other guys, and one day you'll realize you're not just pretending to have fun or playing along with the dude hitting on you-you're legitimately into it.
相信我們。即使你忘不了他，你的行爲要讓人看起來你忘掉了他…...最終會成真的。強迫自己參加聚會，勾搭一下其他的男性朋友，有一天你會意識到你不是在假裝享受樂趣或和喜歡你的人一起玩——這樣做已經名正言順了。

7. Make Yourself Busy
讓自己忙起來

One of the hardest things about breaking up is no longer having a permanent buddy to hang out with every night of the week. To fill the void, make more plans-organize a weekly happy hour with coworkers and brunch dates with your girls. Take on a new hobby, like wine and painting classes or volunteering to walk dogs at an animal shelter.
失戀時最難的事情是每天晚上不再有一個人一直和你待在一起。要想彌補這種空虛感，多做些計劃——和同事一起每週享受一次歡樂時光，和女性朋友們一起吃早午餐。找一個新的愛好，比如品酒、參加繪畫班或去動物收容所做志願者幫忙遛狗。

8. …But Also Let Yourself Cry …
但是也要允許自己大哭

Leave enough room in your sched for the occasional night when you stay home and process the loss of your relationship. Give yourself an hour or two to let it all out, because expressing your grief will help you heal. Just be sure to end things on a positive note, like enjoying a bubblebath or chick flick.
在你的日程表上留下足夠的時間，這樣偶爾一晚上，你可以待在家裏處理失戀的感覺。給自己一兩個小時發泄一下，因爲表達悲傷可以幫你治癒。但是要注意用積極的事情結束，比如享受泡泡浴或看看肥皂劇。

9. De-Clutter Your Life
清理你的生活

Toss his toiletries, send clothes he left at your place back to him, and put any gifts or cards he gave you in a box in your closet (decide later whether you want to keep them; if you purge everything right away, you might regret it). Beyond ditching his stuff, shed clutter in general. Clearing out your place helps clear out your mind and make room for the new.
把他的洗浴用品都扔掉，把他留在你家裏的衣服還給他，把他給你的禮物或卡片都放在櫃子裏的盒子裏（以後再決定是否想保留它們；如果你現在就清理，你以後可能會後悔的）。除了清理他的東西外，也清理一下雜物。清理房間能幫助你清空大腦，爲新的事物騰出空間。

10. Take Off Your Blinders
不要一葉障目

Many women either demonize or idolize their ex post-split. But if you only focus on what an a-hole he was, you'll get bitter. And if all you can remember is his amazing qualities, no other guy will be able to measure up. So take a relationship inventory: Make list of your ex's good and bad traits so you get a complete picture of him. Then remind yourself that the person you're ultimately supposed to be with is out there, and the longer you stay entrenched in your ex, the longer it'll take you to find him.
很多女性在分手之後要麼把前任男友妖魔化要麼就偶像化。但是如果你只關注他不好的方面，你會更加痛苦。如果你只能想起他有多麼好，那沒有人能代替得了他。所以開一張情感清單吧：把前任的優點和缺點都列出來，這樣你能全面地瞭解他。然後提醒自己， 適合你的那個人在等着你。你想前任的時間越長，你就需要更長的時間才能找到另一半。